Question by TruthSeeker: Permission to Marry in the Episcopal Church?
I had a seriously wild past. You can pick on me if you’d like and say I shouldn’t be getting married, but that’s not really the point, here. I was raised in the Episcopal church which is why I want to marry there.
I was married once VERY briefly in the military, and was beaten severely and divorced.
I was married again a few years later, had a child, and the man had many many affairs (some, I later discovered, were before we even married…he was a bit of an “addict”) while also being abusive (though not as much physically), and we divorced.
So I waited many years later, and I re-found a man whom I’ve known since we were young. Our families were close to each other, so I at least knew he wasn’t nuts when we started dating. We have taken things slowly, finally bought a house together, and have lived together for a few years.
We went to the Episcopal priest to plan our wedding for April. He said we’d need a couple meetings first before he decided to sent the letter to the bishop seeking permission for the marriage. We had our first meeting, and he said he’d write the letter. Yesterday, he emailed and said he needed more info and wants to meet with us again.
The problem: Between our last meeting and this one, I have discovered that I was pregnant. VERY unplanned and unexpected.
So the questions: Should I mention this at the next meeting even though it’s early (it will be about 9 weeks at that point) or keep it to myself until the end of the first trimester (so I’m sure of no miscarriage), and after the letter is sent? Do you believe this will change his willingness to seek permission if he knows before writing the letter? Does the Episcopal Church allow for a legal marriage before a church one in the event that we want to marry legally now and continue to plan the church wedding?
I’m not looking for Atheist “Sky Fairy Fiction Book” responses. I believe in it. I am a Christian. Snark won’t change my mind. Please let me know if you actually know anything about this. Thanks.
Ummmm…ok. Well, this church is very old school and the priest is a rather old straight married man. So no, not part of my problem.
They don’t want money. The process and the wedding are free. Unlike the Catholic church whom we went to first because my fiancee is Catholic. They wanted a minimum of $ 1000 and couldn’t even assure us they’d annul the marriages. I don’t know what Episcopal churches you guys are going to, but they’re definitely not following the rules of the church!
Thank you, James. I think I already knew you were right 🙂
Answer by Casey
I am a heterosexual man married to my wife. I have been to an episcapol church. The preacher was a lesbian and was hitting on my wife. I will never go to the episcapol church again. Homosexual preachers is wrong. Dont know if this has anything to do with you and your problem, but just saying.
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